Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Waterlogged and Vicious
I may have lost my superhero status. My power wasn't particularly impressive. I was merely impervious to cold. I had a natural resistance to shivering, chattering, and nostril icicles. Events have conspired to strike down my magic.
There used to be an abandoned lot next to my house. Deer, raccoons, and other assorted mammalia would frolic and defecate amongst the illegally dumped toxic waste and poison oak. Recently the property was sold and for the past several months a construction crew has been laying brick and mortar for condominiums of some sort. They use our running water via a hose, and for some reason this is plugging our pipes.The washing machine could not empty last night, so the spin cycle did nothing to violently throw the water from the fabrics. Therefore all of my clothing went into the dryer sopping wet. After four dryer cycles the clothes were well cooked but still stewy. By that I mean soaked. All my clothes.
Today I left for work in wet clothing and a bad attitude. I've been entertaining myself by considering awful revenge perpetrations.
I would invite homeless and crackheads to the building site next door, but they'd eventually get rousted and I'd be awoken by sirens, bullhorns, and crackling tazer snaps in the middle of the night.
We got new garbagemen two weeks ago and they don't know to come get our bins from the side of the house. We've been ignored and we're overflowing. My garbage may find a cozy new home amongst the dusty infrastucture. It'll be nice to have the raccoons back in the neighborhood.
Spraypaint is so last decade, and arson is beyond my moral code. I'll just need a little patience and I'll move somewhere else in the middle of the summer. 6:27 AM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm
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