Yesterday I obtained permission to recycle several hundred pounds of scrap steel. It's clogging the company storage locker and I'd rather the locker was jammed with ancient registers that are all over the office like giant plastic immobile roaches.

There's lots of useless crap floating about here, including tens of custom made aluminum boxes stuffed with obscure circuitry. They were used for.... nevermind. I trashed them. It took quite a finagle. Certain employees thought some dumb rube would buy them on ebay. No. Just no. I suggested donating them to schools, but they'd have no use for them and the IRS would certainly balk at the dubious write-off. Notion cancelled. The next I proposed was snickered at.

I said we should tear them open and leave them out front, exposing the circuit boards to the sky. If we were quick in reflex and keen of eyesight, we could catch rare exotic endangered birds and sell them to zoos. They'd see the shiny, and hypnotized, circle ever lower to discover what gleaming jewel could be added to their magnificent nests. Problem is, we're in the midwest. The best we could hope for are those abominable Canadian geese and the occasional mallard. Into the dumpster they went.

Yeah, so I'm back on the early shift. Who gave radio shows permission to be funny at 5:30 am? Whoever is responsible is on my shit list. I'll gladly crush his windpipe and eat his children. Warning officially issued, fuckface. 6:31 AM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm