Tinfoil Viking Science: Penny Ante

Situation Normal. Atmosphere Breathable. Brainstem Injected. Dialogue Engaged.

Monday, March 21, 2005

Penny Ante

I may need a doctor. My brain is loose in the pan and slides back and forth when I stand or sit. Each time it thumps to a wet stop against my skull wall. I hear a smacking sound like saltwater against the face of a cliff. Dull reverberations travel down my spine.

My nose bled in the shower this morning. I let it drip and splash for a few seconds. I watched the swirling puddles as they diluted. Steaming jets pelted my palms and rinsed the blood onto the curtain. I licked my upper lip.

I walked outdoors into dry cold. My red nostril froze shut. I tried to breathe through my right. It quickly clogged with yellow. I became a mouthbreather. I felt primitive and stupid.

I was late for work.

My face is hanging from my skull, poorly cured leather hastily stapled to bone by a harried cobbler. I wish to sleep for a day. No smiling until then.

8:31 AM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm

8 Comments:

March 21, 2005 9:22 AM, Caroline said...: Since your now a mouthbreather you should make sure to stand close to some poor unsuspecting and breath the sick breath. Someone else should have to suffer too.
March 21, 2005 9:37 AM, Other Brother said...: Dude, get you some lemon flavored Theraflu and spike it with the Turkey. If you can find local honey, throw that in too. good luck.
March 21, 2005 9:54 AM, Dave Morris said...: Get well my friend. Don't let it all get you down! Consider it an opportunity to get someone, ANYONE, to give you some pity oral.

Preferrably a female.
March 21, 2005 10:08 AM, Lostinspace said...: I've been searching for some worthy blogs to read,and I came across yours and decided that this was one of them. Do whatever you want, but you can find me at circlingaroundmars.blogspot.com
And no pity oral from me. :)
March 21, 2005 1:38 PM, bethany said...: perhaps you need not only pity oral but someone to play nurse for you? i am up for either.
March 21, 2005 1:45 PM, Kerouaced said...: Love the description in this one. You seem to be coming up with more and more good ones.
March 23, 2005 7:13 AM, Anonymous said...: I would comment, but my brain hasn't woken up yet.

Every time I see dave morris' profile pic, though, I think he's Giles.

Can I go back to sleep now?
March 23, 2005 9:18 AM, Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm said...: Huh? What? No, I'm Giles. That's my name. Note my copyright notice below.