Last Friday I called and left a message for my boss. I'd been vomiting, and I decided not to report for work on Friday. On Monday morning, I found a message on my voicemail. She wasn't coming in on Friday. Whoops. Apparently everything ran smoothly without us. That's not good. I am expendable. Apparently.

On Saturday night I went to the Blind Duck. (or the Blind Fuck, according to the vandal who altered the daily specials letterboard) It's a dingy little bar full of poker machines, well practiced karaoke singers, and saggy shouldered barflies. My friends and I tooted some coke and went to occupy the only pool table. Here's an observation. Tapper MGD goes down like water. You barely notice it until the 5th or 6th, when you start to feel a bit warm and noises collide and sound loudly in your ears.

I like bathrooms with saloon doors.

I delivered food all weekend long, spending 21 hours doing it from Friday night through Sunday. This brings to mind something I did a few weeks ago but neglected to mention here.

I was delivering some burgers and chicken sandwiches to a home on a Monday night, and I pulled up to the home after finally finding the numbers. (I hate it when people have no porch lights on and the house looks deserted) I have a habit of leaving the car door open while I run up to the door. It saves a second or two, especially if I have heatkeeper bags or cash in my hands when I return.

In this particular instance I had the food in my lap so I could read the address and total. I jumped out of the car and ran up to the door, and the lady was very nice and friendly, although she must have short sight. Behind me, my car had begun to roll. I made change for her, thanked her for the tip, and turned around and she closed the door behind me.

My car was gone. I saw it down the street halfway up a curb. I hadn't changed gears to park, and my Intrepid had casually strolled about six houses down the block and across the street, and it killed a very nice wooden mailbox painted up in a lovely mallard green hue. The home's front door was open, lights were on, but there was nobody to be seen and no voices to be heard.

I left. I'd intended to go pay for it later on, after work or the next day. With two other orders in my car, I couldn't sit around and wait for police or deal with angry homeowners. I never did go back. It's a good thing I have lots of good karma saved up.
10:57 AM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm