I'm going to the Cubs game tonight. Yesterday the Cubs played a doubleheader, and they lost 4-2 and won 17-4. I hope they put on a good show for me tonight.

One thing I like about Best Buy is how the security guard at the doors is disguised as a greeter. When a good greeter is at the door, my spirit of community and goodwill is refreshed by the country store feeling I get from a good "Welcome, How are you today?" Especially if it sounds sincere. Even though I know better. Corporate policy, the employee's paycheck, and the lack of stained wood point out that there is nothing genuine about the greeting. The illusion, however, is very nice if you ignore reality.

I got drunk last night, my only day off in two weeks, and I ate way too much pizza. Today I am waddling about like a duck, drinking lots of water, and trying to adjust to my new body shape and weight. I've needed to gingerly lower myself into my luxurious swivel chair. I have had to hyperventilate (almost) because I am so full that my diaphram cannot expand all of the way and I cannot take in my normal breathing capacity. Naturally I skipped lunch, although I have heard that the little packet of salted peanuts in the vending machine wants me to eat it.
3:53 PM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm