Friday, October 27, 2006
Side Order #1
I strolled into my new night job at the bar & grill. It was day three after the grand opening. The youngsters at the host station were smiling and energetic.
“Hey Steve! What’s up?”
They laughed. That crazy Steve, telling another wacky joke. He’s not serious.
After all, who would show up at a brand new job so drunk his breath could strip paint? Nobody. Well, except for me. I’d been coerced into waxing a bottle of Bacardi 151 at my day job, not to mention the six bottles of Oktoberfest I’d used as chasers.
When I left the alcoholics at my first job behind, I chewed some cinnamon gum, squeezed one eye shut, and drove a mile west to the night gig.
I repeated the same answer when the general manager clamped his meaty hand on my shoulder and asked my mood.
“Drunk as a skunk, sir! Ready to sling fried snacks and radiate sunshine!”
He grinned back at me.
“You all see this guy? We need more like him!"
"Anything to keep America happy and full of greasy food, sir."
"You’re a smartass, but I like that. We need energetic people like you. Gimme a high five!”
I even scored a raise that day for superior customer service and for mentoring my less adept coworkers in the nuances of touchscreen register usage.
If I start doing coke again, I could be a manager.
I'm gonna do some short takes for a while. I don't have the time or energy for anthing more involved these days, so I'm taking the lazy route and dropping my material unpolished in small, half thought out pieces like the above. 5:04 PM - Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm
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